Giving up on life
A search string that recently referred someone to this site was the phrase when it’s time to give up on life.
It struck a bit of a chord with me and got me thinking about the question it poses: what do we do if we hit a point so low we are found typing about giving up into a search engine? Maybe some people are not literally at a point of giving up but it’s more a cry of desperation or frustration, a kind of ‘what do I do now!’ situation. So many others however really are feeling like there is no point to life.
Even though I have so much to be thankful for in my own life, it’s certainly not always been completely trouble or pain free – the fact is, we all go through our share of ups and downs in life.
When is it time to give up on life? Is there ever a time?
What can someone do when they feel that the problems they face are so, so overwhelming that life just isn’t worth living?
I wrote a post from personal experience a while back titled the tragedy of amazing success. Basically it’s a quick example of how (contrary to popular belief) ‘having it all’ won’t make you invulnerable to feeling like it’s time to give up on life, and even acting on those feelings.
So when is it time to give up on life?
If you really are feeling like you’ve hit rock bottom, can I suggest you check out what to do if feeling suicidal for Australians, or suicide information for the Americas. Also have a look at resources for depression and other treatable illnesses at family doctor.
My personal feelings? The answer to the question is Never. Absolutely never.
Don’t ever give up on life. Life is a precious gift, and there is so much more to life than your current circumstance. I don’t want to pretend to understand what other people are going through, but sometimes with time our situations change, if only we have faith and never give up.
“Defeat may test you; it need not stop you. If at first you don’t succeed, try another way. For every obstacle there is a solution. Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. The greatest mistake is giving up.”
~anon
Blatantly Honest Responses to ‘Giving Up on Life’ Giving and receiving: a new approach What are you looking for in life? Life’s not about ‘what’s better than’ The heart of life
July 12th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
I have been in and through situations where it feels like being in a bottom of a deep hole where no one knows you’re there and it feels like there is no way out. On way or another, I was able to find my way out of this hole. I used therapy, support, time. Whatever you are going though feels 10x worse when you are alone so having support is huge.
Carla´s last blog ..Financial Prosperity = Planet in destitute?
July 13th, 2009 at 8:21 am
I have experienced a few bottomless pits myself.Support is fantastic but I think it is up to the individual to come to terms with the bad experience and this could take a while.
Talking about it with someone not so close to you, I have found is best and it doesn’t have to be a doctor, always.
July 13th, 2009 at 10:08 am
@Carla – Hi, thanks for sharing.. Support is such an important part of getting through dark times.
@Bunnygotblog – Good point, maybe some people feel easier about talking to a third party or stranger than speaking with relatives etc.
July 17th, 2009 at 3:10 am
Hi Taeran, thanks for this post. I hope it will give more people the opportunity to think about the value of life. I hope more people would share their stories like Carla and bunnygotblog did. I am therapsit myself and I often work with depression and see how support can make a difference.
I enjoy your style. Gilead, London
Gilead´s last blog ..Unknown outcomes
July 17th, 2009 at 5:33 pm
@Gilead – Hi there, thanks for visiting. It’s great to hear words of support, I’m assuming as a therapist you know what you’re talking about
July 23rd, 2009 at 2:09 am
I feel like everyone in the world has their own story to tell. We’ve all hit our lows and highs. It’s hard for me to really understand and feel your story and it works both ways. I believe there’s always a reason to give up on life, but there’s never a time you should consider it.
Life always changes if you want it to. Look at how we viewed life as children and how we see life today. It’s like a completely different world; not because the world changed so much. It’s more of our view of the world changing. Our priorities, values, and perspectives. Most of us in this world are living in a bubble, day in and day out. Work, Eat, Sleep, and Relax. When we were kids, we were curious and we experienced and encounter different scenarios that were unique.
We can start to change “our” lives by simply starting to shape the way we perceive it. Start introducing small changes and keep working at it. You will eventually break free from the bubble and truly understand what life is all about!
Great post! I still find it interesting the terms people search for on search engines. I’ve had my fair share of weird search engine traffic! Keep up the good writing! (=
taney´s last blog ..Guiding Through Change
July 31st, 2009 at 11:28 pm
@Taney – Hi there, thanks for taking the time out to visit & comment.
I totally agree with you that there’s always another option, sometimes we are blinded by our current situations. A good tip as you mention is to do it slowly, with small changes at a time.
Thanks for visiting!
August 26th, 2009 at 4:56 pm
just give up, give in, let go. who cares?
August 27th, 2009 at 12:39 am
Apparently YOU don’t, blah… Care to elaborate?
September 13th, 2009 at 2:43 pm
Every person I’ve ever been in a relationship with has given up on life. Its very frustrating.I know that I have severe depression, but haven’t ever given up, I always try and find a reason to motivate myself. I hope to one day find happiness somehow, and I choose not to give up, or give in to addiction.
September 14th, 2009 at 3:02 am
Hi Beram04, thanks for sharing.
I can’t imagine how frustrating it must feel to be in your situation. I’m pleased to hear that despite all you’ve been through you’re still hanging in there.
maybe consider giving this a go.
All the best
November 27th, 2009 at 3:36 am
I am just lost myself, and it’s easier to talk to a third person sometimes than someone close to you… often the people closest provide numerous lectures instead of just listening and being there.
As I write this tears are flowing, and I am once again disappointed that my trust has been betrayed, and people can love and cheat so easily… and lie, how smoothly they lied. I know life will get better, I am strong enough but right now everything hurts, the words he said hurt… disappointing after 9 months he understood me so little and shed his own guilt on me.
November 27th, 2009 at 8:01 am
Hi Pam, thanks for visiting & taking the time to share.
So sorry to hear that things are not going well for you at the moment. What you’ve shared is another reminder to me, and others, that people will always be… people. Meaning, there are times in our lives where people will let us down & disappoint us, despite best intentions.
I trust that you’ll find strength in the knowledge that you CAN get through this, and that life has so much more to offer.
All the best
November 30th, 2009 at 10:41 pm
I dont know if you will believe. I searched exactly with the words giving up. Life takes its turns. I have a very stressful time.Though I am a doctor, to be on the other side of the table is a totally different feeling.My daughter has been seriously ill,and as you said,it changes your attitudes towards life.Sometimes,all said and done,it is difficult to go forwards.I cant find reasons why such things happen in life.It is such a sad thing that your child is ill,and you sit and watch. Helpless,frustration..what not.I know sometimes things happen for a reason,but other times,I cant find any.
Now I fully understand the anxiety and stress of the family of those who come to me.I could never understand it if I hadnt passed through my present situations.May be,that is the purpose. May be,life wants to teach me something. It probably wants me to be a better physician,who understands the feeling of others.
Antony´s last blog ..Human rights or terrorist rights?
December 10th, 2009 at 9:47 am
Giving up seems to be by words for me and I have always rebounded,but the end is near and closing fast. I got diagonosed with a cancerous tumor 12 years ago, did the chemo and radiation, and then the life changing therapy. So I survived my fit of depression then but still wear the bag to remind me. Then came a dying liver that I have been dealing with, done all the right things to stay on the transplant list. (Ha) sitting here with the letter of removing me from the list sitting next to the keyboard. Why, not because I gave up, but rather now I have been diagnosed with cancer of the liver. So I spent my time again expanding my understanding of all the paticulars of the disease. What I got for all this is the biopsy which I am waiting to be scheduled for, three simple words. I give up. Tom
December 10th, 2009 at 2:46 pm
[...] few months back I wrote a post titled Giving Up on Life as a response to a search string that someone had used to visit here: “when it’s time to [...]
December 12th, 2009 at 10:30 am
Antony & Tom – Thanks for posting, I’ve replied (sort of) in this post: Honest Responses to Giving Up On Life
February 11th, 2010 at 10:30 am
Tom, It is horrible what you have endured. It makes life look so much better for all the other post. Read my site It may give you some enlightenment it the midst of the storm.
http://sites.google.com/site/howtofindgodnow/
February 27th, 2010 at 2:34 am
well. tbh this is for some of the teen’s outthere. i’m 16 year’s old. ive had MANY bumps in my life. even a few hills to climb over. idk what ur going trough. but ive been ina pit or ina hole serveral times. layed around depressed. didn’t wanna go to school. i guess my reason was i didn’t really have a reason to live anymore because i didn’t want one. i just gave up. and came close to suicide. i have serveral pictures of my arms being scard, or blood on them from cutting trying to deal with the pain. after awhile. you really only have 2 options. 1 give up on life. and end it. i don’t reccomend that one, or two. find a way out of the hole. like i did. if you can find a reason in your life to live. i promise its all worth it. yea. you going to have more holes, more bumps, and hills to cross. but in the end. its all worth it.