Change your stress levels

Sometimes I’ve heard my kids come out with statements such as ‘Oh, I’m so stressed right now’ or ‘you’re making me feel stressed’. In reality, these feelings of stress typically become a lot greater as we get older and our responsibilities change, and when I hear my kids make such statement I often think to myself ‘I don’t think you know what stress really is yet!’.

In the last 5 years of my life I found my personality and character has changed a lot compared to when I was a teenager. It’s not so much that my interests are massively different, or that I have morphed into a completely different being, but I have noticed the way I respond to situations and handle problems has changed.

Some of these changes are for the better – I have learned not to race in to problems without thinking things through, and I have become a lot better at not blurting out the first thing that comes into my head!

Some of the changes are not so good – sometimes I don’t recognise warning signs of when a stressful event is affecting me. Partly this is probably due to not having as many cares when I was younger, or maybe it’s that the ramifications of my actions now affect other people in my life who count on me – my wife and kids are directly affected by my job and money decisions, for instance.

Stress affects different people in different ways. Some of the more common stressors that affect lots of people include the following:

  • life events (births, deaths, marriage or divorce)
  • responsibilities (unemployment, no money)
  • illness (sickness, depression)
  • work/study stressors
  • personal relationships (conflict, lack of trust issues, demands placed on people)
  • lifestyle (lack of sleep, drinking, drugs, wasting time)
  • Environment (living situations, housing, food, clothing, freedom or mobility issues)
  • Social (isolation, problems fitting in)

credit: c@rljones

For me personally, it’s been a difficult thing to admit that I can get affected by stress! Partly this is a pride thing, partly its because I’m male. Being Australian does not help either (don’t you know that Aussie guys are tough?) But when I really take a step back and look at things, I can not only see how stressful events affect my decisions and actions, but also my body and health.

Stress can manifest itself in many different ways. Helpguide.org list several of the more common symptoms as follows:

Cognitive Symptoms, such as :
* Memory problems
* Indecisiveness
* Inability to concentrate
* Trouble thinking clearly
* Poor judgment
* Seeing only the negative

Emotional Symptoms, like:
* Moodiness
* Agitation
* Restlessness
* Short temper
* Irritability, impatience
* Depression or general unhappiness

Physical Symptoms:
* Headaches or backaches
* Muscle tension and stiffness
* Diarrhea or constipation
* Nausea, dizziness
* Insomnia

Behavioral Symptoms:
* Eating more or less
* Sleeping too much or too little
* Isolating yourself from others
* Procrastination, neglecting responsibilities
* Using alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs to relax
* Nervous habits (e.g. nail biting, pacing)

Many other medical conditions are caused or exacerbated by stress, such as:
* Chronic pain * Migraines * Ulcers * Heartburn * High blood pressure

Stress can be part of your life in small or large amounts, and the initial goal is not really to completely eliminate it from your life. Emotions, responses, interactions and feelings are an important part of being human and enjoying life! You still want to be able to experience and handle these emotions and life experiences without becoming a lifeless brick wall who doesn’t respond or react to other people. Managing stress is the real key, and can help you to become healthier and enjoy life more.

Reach out have some easy beginner tips to managing stress:

Go for a Walk or Run – Exercising can be a good way of relieving stress. It helps to get rid of all that pent up energy and can leave you feeling much calmer. Any sort of exercise can be good. You may want to go and kick a footy with friends or head to the gym.

Hang Out with Friends – If you are feeling stressed you may need to take your mind off things for a while. Hanging out with friends is one way of doing that. It may be that similar things that stress you out, also stress your friends out, and so talking about your problems with them may be helpful.

Taking Some Deep Breaths – Deep breathing can help to relax the body and hence calm you down. Taking deep breaths before an exam, game, job interview or before going on stage may help to calm you down and focus on what it is you are about to do.

Setting Realistic Goals – Becoming over-stressed may make it harder to keep things in perspective. Setting realistic goals (both for the short-term and long-term) and priorities and time management may be useful ways of managing your stress. You may want to check out the fact sheet on Stress at Exam Time, Time Management and Setting Goals for more information.

Have Multiple Options to Achieve your Goals – There is never just one way to achieve something. It’s important not to put all your eggs into one basket – investigate and plan other ways to get to where you want to go, whether it’s a uni degree, job, or holiday vacation.

Try to Avoid Smoking, Alcohol, and Caffeine – It may be tempting to use smoking and alcohol as a means of managing your stress. Try to avoid using these things as a way of coping, as in the long run they may make you more stressed out.

Watch What You’re Thinking - Your outlook, attitude, and thoughts influence the way you see things. Is your cup half full or half empty? A healthy dose of optimism can help you make the best out of stressful circumstances. Even if you’re out of practice, or tend to be a bit of a pessimist, everyone can learn to think more optimistically and reap the benefits.

Speaking to Someone - If you are finding you are always stressed and it is hard to carry on with day to day stuff, it may be helpful to talk to someone about it. Parents, teachers, a school counsellor or youth worker are people that may be able to help you cope. Check out the Finding Help section for more information on who can help you.

Additionally, diet and exercise can play a role in helping manage stress levels appropriately.