Parenting is very difficult to describe to anyone who hasn’t been through it before. Before you become a parent, you have a lot of time to watch other parents and kids in action.

Throughout this time most people begin to have some great ideas about how they’re going to tackle parenting, and it certainly won’t be like all those other parents thank you very much! Your parenting won’t allow for temper tantrums or whinging, and your child certainly won’t be a spoiled brat like so many others!

And then you have a child (smirk).

The longer I have been a parent, the more I have found that parenting really is a dynamic process. There are very few certainties to rely on – so many factors affect all kinds of different situations; so much of parenting is trial and error. Something that worked well for dealing with one particular situation may be the worst way to tackle another.

credit: ishkamina

 
The age of your kids, the age of the parents, past experiences on both parts; who’s around, who’s involved, misunderstandings, miscommunication – the list goes on and on: variables come in to play with so much of a parent’s decision making that it makes it tough to create any kind of “do it this way” manual for parents.

Is parenting worth it?

This is something I’ve been asked quite a few times over the years! Recently I was up at Noosa beach and there was a family there with two young kids. The oldest girl, maybe about three years old, was causing a bit of attention. Probably she was over-tired, probably she didn’t get her own way, and so she decided to throw herself on the ground right beside a main walkway and thrash around in the sand screaming and crying. It was one of those “my life is so bad” whining cries that went on and on and on for about ten minutes.

Her dad was standing about 5 or 6 metres away with his hands on his hips, looking calm but with just a hint of annoyance in his eyes – here we are at a beautiful beach and look at you! When he came up to try and rationalise with the girl (ha!), I was telling him how it brought back memories of my kids when they were young. “Does it ever get any better!?” he asked me…

credit: Steve Wampler

The short answer to the question about parenting is: yes, it’s worth it.. or else no one would have kids!

But let me qualify that statement by sharing with you what happened to me last night. We were at a school fete, one of those ones with rides, face painting, fairy floss, laughter… My youngest daughter was hanging out with her friends and was lining up to go on a ride. After she got on the ride with two of her friends and the ride started, I was standing by myself watching her. The three of them were laughing and really enjoying themselves. At one point the ride spun around and she caught my eye.

It’s difficult to explain what happened in that brief second, but my heart melted. Seeing my daughter in a state of real, carefree joy was enough to just about bring me to tears. Despite all the effort that parenting has caused, the sleepless nights with sick kids, the countless arguments, the money spent – in that one moment I was hit with an amazing sense of pride, joy, love.. and peace. This is what living is all about..

Maybe you’ve had different experiences than me – I know for some parents they will tell you that parenting wrecked their lives! In my opinion however, the experience of parenting is an amazing roller-coaster that is filled with good times, bad times, fun times and sad times. You will lose your sanity, your sleep, your mind.. and you will find yourself. So many great things come from being a parent, it really is life changing – and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

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